CW ---(ChrisW)

This is verbatim taken from SA Express-News 06-05-99, from article titled, 'Experts say don't give children everything' by Anastasia Cisneros-Lunsford: this is verbatim..."Children who are handed everything without having to earn it often feel as deprived as those who have nothing, and those feelings can sometimes erupt in violence, a leading expert on school climate and the community said Friday". "Upper-middle class teen-agers who get everything they want, from designer clothes to cars, have no experience with 'pulling the lever of life to produce results', Dennis Embry, a child psychologist from Tucson, Ariz., said during the Koch Crime Institute seminar at the DoubleTree Hotel." "Law Enforcement Officers, judicial representatives and school administrators attended the one-day seminar on the causes, effects and prevention of youth violence." "Experts like Embry and Dave Grossman, a retired Army psychologist and former West Point professor, discussed the mass killings at Columbine High School in Littleton, Colo,; the bloodshed in Jonesboro, Ark.; and the startling effects of negative reinforcement." "Children need to feel reward, but only when they have accomplished something, said Embry, the founder of PeaceBuuilders, a nationally recognized youth violence prevention program." "'They have the BMW and everything the've ever wanted, but they will act like deprived children,' he said." "'(Children) are just given stuff but they don't feel fed because (they) didn't make it happen'". "The hunger for social acceptance, Embry said, creates a bath of negative brain chemicals." "'A balanced brain is filled with action. There is a belief that good things happen. It enjoys novelty, but has a tolerance for order. It doesn't overreact (to commands) and is not constantly mad at the world', he said." The article goes on about a skit they did to show what they're talking about and how bad behavior must be balanced w/in a pos. environment. Continues with, "...Law enforcement officers and educators are too busy trying to predict which child will be violent, instead of improving the environment in which they learn". I must say I mostly agree with the things stated, I also believe though there are well-adapted/mature teen's who may be 'given' nice things and they will appreciate them. Although IMO, the majority fall into the other category and do not appreciate nice 'things' as much if they'd had a part in earning them. Those who wish to label this as jealousy is ridiculous. Yes, jealousy would undoubtedly be what I would've felt if I was a teenager, but going on 32 and married, jealously is the last thing on my mind when I see guys like Kean or others his age driving/asking about pricier cars. It really doesn't matter to me what he drives, it's his and his parents' money and choice. Everybody has an opinion, and nobody will change anothers' on this forum. I'll try to keep mine to myself, but I believe my parents did the right thing by buying me a '79 Rabbit (was either that or a Granada) when I was a sophomore and had me start bagging groceries to help pay for it. <p>99.5 1.8tqms.....makin' payments! hehe

Kean

I'd just like to say that this is a load of crap! Thank you.<br>-Kean

IronMike

My problem isn't with what Kean drives. I'm bothered by Kean's arrogance.

mike lou

Yup....work and dedication builds character...and everyone should have character, If you are given things without being taught their true value, then your parents, or your teachers would have done you a huge disservice. Of course, it is alot more pleasant to receive things without working...but in the long run, you will fall short of things which require you to work hard to attain. Just my opinion.<br>mike

mike lou

Yup....work and dedication build character...and everyone should have character, If you are given things without being taught their true value, then your parents, or your teachers would have done you a huge disservice. Of course, it is alot more pleasant to receive things without working...but in the long run, you will fall short of things which require you to work hard to attain. Just my opinion.<br>mike

DaveL

1) Quit this discussion<br>2) Move it to General Forum<br>3) Move it to www.parenting.com <p>I prefer #3.<p>Dave<br>'97 1.8TQMS <<< A4 content!<p><p>

You're headed for a fall

<br>Kean, have mommy and daddy buy you that fancy car. Have them send you to a fancy school. And when you underachieve in college because you've never had to work for anything, just ask daddy to buy your way into that fancy law school. You will be fine (as long as mommy and daddy are there to pave your way with money).<p>You won't learn anything about life until your parents pull the rug out from under you. Hope it won't be too late.

Mark

I vote for Option 3

HOW OLD IS KEAN? [nt]

[nt]

Wish to remain anonymous

Works damn hard for his money and I think gets a lot of pleasure out of buying me things. He grew up fairly poor in his home country, came to America and did very well for himself. He bought everything he had wanted and now is treating his children. I feel that there is nothing wrong with that. I appreciate teh fact that he works hard and earns his money. He refuses to make me work, he would rather me focus on my Med Schhol studies. He foots the bill BTW.<br>I am very proud of him, what he has accomplished, and only hope that when my studies are complete, I can replicate the successes he has accomplished in life.<br>Thank you.