Brazil

1 Top of your head gets cold in winter
2 Your part keeps getting wider...and wider.
3 Boss says "lets send one of the younger guys on the recruiting trip this year"
4 People put shades on when talking to you in a well lit room.
5 Tired housewives expect you to leave their kitchens sparkling clean and ask where that cute gold earring went.
6 When people can see your thoughts
7 Can't conceal the horns anymore...
8 It's been years since anyone asked, "Have you changed your hair?"
9 People start calling you "Mr.Clean".
10 The barber starts charging you less for hair-cuts
11 The sun seems to be getting hotter
12 When David Letterman starts making bald jokes about YOU
13 You get more coupons for Rogaine than you get America On-Line disks.
14 You no longer have a dandruff problem
15 You refer to it as a "Haircut with a hole in it".
16 you start putting suntan oil on your scalp
17 You're still using the same bottle of shampoo after two years...
18 Your forhead seems to be growing
19 No one asks to borrow a comb anymore.
20 People keep referring to you as "Captain Picard"
21 People mistaking you for *any* NBA star.
22 When you can wear a toilet plunger as a hat.
23 You actually wear that "solar panel for a sex machine" t-shirt
24 You find yourself a faster runner due to better aerodynamics.
25 You find yourself going to the barbershop for contributions
26 You stop finding hair in the sink
27 You think William Shatner's hair piece looks pretty good.
28 You wear a T-Shirt that says - The more hair I lose, the more head I get!
29 You wear a turban and you're a non Arab.
30 Your dog is irritated by how much you are shedding.
31 Your name is MICHAEL BOLTON!
32 Aliens came down and burnt it off
33 Dog makes herself a playmate from your shedding
34 Each day takes longer to wash your face
35 Friends stop calling you 'homey' and start calling you 'chromey'.
36 Hair restorer ads dom't seem so dumb after all
37 If you play volleyball and people keep swinging at your head.
38 In the morning, the sun rises twice
39 People repeatedly poking you in the back of the head with a cue stick.
40 People squint at you on sunny days because of glare.
41 People start calling you Captian.
42 People start looking for their sunglasses when they realize that you are coming toward them.
43 Santa wants you to guide his sleigh
44 Teenagers pop thier zits in the reflection off your forehead!!
45 The thought of growing your eyebrows to preposterous lengths and combing them straight back actually crosses your mind.
46 When you forget the words to ALL the bald jokes you've ever told.
47 People say "but your face suits it"
48 People say "nice face, it goes all the way to the back of your head !"
49 When you decide to see how many people you can fool by growing a beard and walking on your hands.
50 When you go to work, your pet ostrich chases you thinking her precious egg is trying to run away.
51 Your wife applies her makeup from the reflection on your head

dano-oly

29. Turbin? Is that the container that holds the shop's K04's?

Brazil

I didn't write it.

O.W. Kenobi

You should have edited it. I think you're going to lose the Spelling Sherriff election in 2008.

AuDIDAS4:SZR

I prefer the term "folically challenged".

dano-oly

Doesn't look too good for you either, "Sherriff" :P

O.W. Kenobi

I'll just have to pull a Tonya Harding and take him out, then. LOL